The Hubs and I went to spend the weekend with his parents for Father’s Day, and while we were there we all went out on a trip to the GTA to see some of his extended family. Their family gatherings are considerably smaller and more low-key than mine are, and they also tend to cover a broader (and sometimes darker) range of topics. They each tend to have a pretty sarcastic sense of humour and whatnot.
Anyway, while I was sitting on the couch listening to the various conversations going on around me, I began listening to my mother-in-law’s conversation with her father about arrangements he’s made for his funeral when he passes away. It’s not really something I like to think about, but then again, the Hubs and I have not made any kind of wills or anything of the sort yet, and I started thinking about what I think I would want. The Hub’s grandfather has everything planned right down to the hymns that will be sung at his memorial service–and I think that that is very smart. I’m pretty sure that my grandfather had just about everything taken care of when he passed away so that my grandma wouldn’t have to worry about anything.
Funerals are sad. There is no getting around that. But I don’t think that they have to be depressing. I’ve been to some pretty sad services, but I’ve also been to services that have been less depressing, and focussed more on the celebration of that person’s life. That’s what I want. I want to be cremated, I think the money it costs for caskets and embalming services is out of control. I really don’t want a wake, just a memorial service. And the more I think about it, I really don’t want people’s last memory of me to be of me lying in a box. I understand that people enjoy it for closure, but I think photographs can do more justice. They can capture life, laughter and love. I want hymns sung, stories told and memories preserved. That’s all. Mind you, I’m not planning on going anywhere in a long, long, long, long time (I’ve told the Hubs he’s stuck with me for at least a 60 yr. marriage) but I think that it’s something that’s worth spending a little time thinking about.
Anyway, should anything ever happen, that’s what I would want to happen. And now I’m off to make dinner. :)